I dont know if its true but when people say they learn from mistakes, why doesn't it happen to me =.=
Im going through the same thing again and i f u c k i n g noe it =.=
Arghhhhhhhh
The feeling of seeing the bright light....then suddenly, SLAM!!! right in your face
Hope?confidence?hasn't been helping lately.its more to a fantasy
There goes, a msg arrives at my phone, but its another disappointment. Repeatedly happening for the past week.
At this point, i don't know what to do anymore.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Got it from Kel
Your Deadly Sins |
 Greed: 80% Envy: 40% Pride: 40% Gluttony: 20% Sloth: 20% Wrath: 20% Lust: 0% Chance You'll Go to Hell: 31% You'll die in a castle, surrounded by servants. |
How Sinful Are You?
I really dunno if this is a good or bad result though. To me its rather wrong =.=
Friday, June 27, 2008
Unmistakably for you
Its just a story to tell.
It doesn't affect anything.
The past IS the past.
Theres nothing to worry about thinking of it.
When you stumble upon something you remember,
something you had good times with.
Smile about it, not getting upset about it.
The past helps to build us.
Without the past, we wont be who we are right now.
We wont be the exact person we are right now.
Its our history that changed our character, changed our life.
Sometimes we turn to look at whats left behind.
It isn't wrong to do so,
In fact its the correct thing to retrace our steps
To see that its heading the correct direction.
The past may haunt you,
Its only a matter of time before it gets tired of doing so
The thing is, sometimes we go around thinking we are weaker
Inferior, lower or even the worst of the worse.
This is caused by not letting go of whats happened in our life.
Holding too tightly, with just a spark of hope that things could rewind.
That would be drowning in the past.
Swimming downwards constantly isn't gonna help you
The deeper you go, the worse it gets
Don't let the past kill you
I know its difficult
And i know you're trying hard
Let me be there for you
To guide you
To lift you up to the surface
Where everything is clearer and brighter
The past is where we learn our mistakes from
Not to dwell in.
Its futile trying to turn back time.
Cause it will never happen
If we could rewind time,
everyone will take things for granted
And the past is what makes us appreciate what we have right before our eyes.
The past does not and will not affect a thing between us
It'll just merely be a reference book showing the Do's and Don'ts
Use it well
No matter how far you have fallen in the past,
Its doesn't matter
For the thing that matters most is that you can pick yourself up
And growing out of it
Thats what counts
I know you are capable of doing so
Everyone is capable of doing more than they think
You do too.
Like i have always said,
Everyone deserves a chance
So the world hasn't ended yet.
Get up and walk forward
It isn't worth it to stop now
Theres far too much to be missed if you stop
Look forward, theres so much in store for you
Its only if you are willing to let go of whats in your hand
Then you are be able to grasp the next thing that comes to you
Help me help you
I know that i can assist you
Let me be there to pull you away from it all
Start afresh.
Walk away from it all, smiling
Step into a new world, laughing
Just a reminder, i'll be there whenever you need to unload.
Live life to the fullest people say :D
Its just a matter of time before everything turns out better
Give it time
It doesn't affect anything.
The past IS the past.
Theres nothing to worry about thinking of it.
When you stumble upon something you remember,
something you had good times with.
Smile about it, not getting upset about it.
The past helps to build us.
Without the past, we wont be who we are right now.
We wont be the exact person we are right now.
Its our history that changed our character, changed our life.
Sometimes we turn to look at whats left behind.
It isn't wrong to do so,
In fact its the correct thing to retrace our steps
To see that its heading the correct direction.
The past may haunt you,
Its only a matter of time before it gets tired of doing so
The thing is, sometimes we go around thinking we are weaker
Inferior, lower or even the worst of the worse.
This is caused by not letting go of whats happened in our life.
Holding too tightly, with just a spark of hope that things could rewind.
That would be drowning in the past.
Swimming downwards constantly isn't gonna help you
The deeper you go, the worse it gets
Don't let the past kill you
I know its difficult
And i know you're trying hard
Let me be there for you
To guide you
To lift you up to the surface
Where everything is clearer and brighter
The past is where we learn our mistakes from
Not to dwell in.
Its futile trying to turn back time.
Cause it will never happen
If we could rewind time,
everyone will take things for granted
And the past is what makes us appreciate what we have right before our eyes.
The past does not and will not affect a thing between us
It'll just merely be a reference book showing the Do's and Don'ts
Use it well
No matter how far you have fallen in the past,
Its doesn't matter
For the thing that matters most is that you can pick yourself up
And growing out of it
Thats what counts
I know you are capable of doing so
Everyone is capable of doing more than they think
You do too.
Like i have always said,
Everyone deserves a chance
So the world hasn't ended yet.
Get up and walk forward
It isn't worth it to stop now
Theres far too much to be missed if you stop
Look forward, theres so much in store for you
Its only if you are willing to let go of whats in your hand
Then you are be able to grasp the next thing that comes to you
Help me help you
I know that i can assist you
Let me be there to pull you away from it all
Start afresh.
Walk away from it all, smiling
Step into a new world, laughing
Just a reminder, i'll be there whenever you need to unload.
Live life to the fullest people say :D
Its just a matter of time before everything turns out better
Give it time
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Say ' Dont Want'
Feeling down?depressed?stressed?
Alcohol!!!
is not the way to relieve yourself.
Drinks are not good for health. It hurts your liver, hurts your heart and most of all hurts your pocket.
They are just a temporary relieve for your mental pain but worsens it thereafter. So please stop drinking for the sake of it. It is rely Bo Tat.
Thank You
Alcohol!!!
is not the way to relieve yourself.
Drinks are not good for health. It hurts your liver, hurts your heart and most of all hurts your pocket.
They are just a temporary relieve for your mental pain but worsens it thereafter. So please stop drinking for the sake of it. It is rely Bo Tat.
Thank You
Say ' Tak Nak'
Say Noooooo to cigarettes!
Kata tak nak kepada rokok!
Kong mai sok hun ki!
Ciang bu yao xi yan!
Inga puringe kata mau kote! ( tamil i dunno)
So to all smokers out there please stop smoking. Its bad for health to put a stick to your mouth be it small stick or bigger stick. So whenever you see a cig, just walk away from it.
If you think smoking is the solution,
THINK AGAIN
* advertisement rings *
So please be considerate. Don't kill yourself even if you want to kill the people around you. Imagine all the things you will miss if you die years earlier just because of cigs.
Thank You
Kata tak nak kepada rokok!
Kong mai sok hun ki!
Ciang bu yao xi yan!
Inga puringe kata mau kote! ( tamil i dunno)
So to all smokers out there please stop smoking. Its bad for health to put a stick to your mouth be it small stick or bigger stick. So whenever you see a cig, just walk away from it.
If you think smoking is the solution,
THINK AGAIN
* advertisement rings *
So please be considerate. Don't kill yourself even if you want to kill the people around you. Imagine all the things you will miss if you die years earlier just because of cigs.
Thank You
The Road Not Taken by Albert Einstein
NGEK NGEK NGEK NGEK HA HA HA HA HO HO HO HO HI HI HI HI HE HE HE HE HE NGO NGO NGO NGO NGA NGA NGA BE BE BE BI BI BI BI BA BA BA BA BO BO BO BO
PU PU PU KI KI KI KI BIN BIN BIN BIN HA HA HA LO LO LO LO L L L L X X X X X HA HO HE HI HO HU HA HE HI HO PEI PEI PEI PEI PO PO PO PO PA LA LA LA LA
KE KE KE KE ON ON ON ON KA KA KA KA N N N N N N HE HE HE HE HE KA KA KA NI NI NI NI NE NE NE NE MA MA MA CI CI CI CI BA BA BA I I I I W W W W W T T T T F F F F O O O O M M M M GO GO GO GO D D D D D Z Z Z
F F F F U U U U C C C C K K K K I I I I N N N N B B B B B O O O O R R R R E E E E D D D D L L L L L A A A A L L L L L E E E E M M M M A A A A L L L L E E E E H H H H
I I I I F F F Y Y Y Y O O O O U U U U C C C C A A A A N N N R R R R E E E E A A A A D D D T T T T T H H H H I I I I S S S S T T T T T H H H H E E E E N N N N Y Y Y Y O O O O U U U U A A A A R R R E E E A A A A F F F F F U U U U C C C C K K K K I I I I N N N N N N N N O O O O L L L L I I I I F F F F E E E E R R R R
OK OK OK OK OK OK KO KO KO KO KO KO M M M M A A A T T T T A A A A A H H H H A A A A I I I I C C C C C H H H H A A A A O O O O C C C C I I I I B B B B A A A A I I I I B B B B B U U U U L L L L A A A A N N N N G G G G S S S S A A A A I I I I B B B B O O O L L L L A A A A N N N N G G G A A A A I I I I
I I I I K K K K E E E E N N N N G G G G Y Y Y Y O O O U U U U M M M M O O O O T T T T H H H H E E E E R R R R F F F F U U U U C C C K K K K E E E E R R R R S S S S S S S S O O O O N N N S S S A A A A N N N N D D D D D D D D A A A A U U U U G G G G H H H H T T T T E E E R R R R S S S S O O O O O F F F F A A A A S S S S E E E E S S S S S
PU PU PU KI KI KI KI BIN BIN BIN BIN HA HA HA LO LO LO LO L L L L X X X X X HA HO HE HI HO HU HA HE HI HO PEI PEI PEI PEI PO PO PO PO PA LA LA LA LA
KE KE KE KE ON ON ON ON KA KA KA KA N N N N N N HE HE HE HE HE KA KA KA NI NI NI NI NE NE NE NE MA MA MA CI CI CI CI BA BA BA I I I I W W W W W T T T T F F F F O O O O M M M M GO GO GO GO D D D D D Z Z Z
F F F F U U U U C C C C K K K K I I I I N N N N B B B B B O O O O R R R R E E E E D D D D L L L L L A A A A L L L L L E E E E M M M M A A A A L L L L E E E E H H H H
I I I I F F F Y Y Y Y O O O O U U U U C C C C A A A A N N N R R R R E E E E A A A A D D D T T T T T H H H H I I I I S S S S T T T T T H H H H E E E E N N N N Y Y Y Y O O O O U U U U A A A A R R R E E E A A A A F F F F F U U U U C C C C K K K K I I I I N N N N N N N N O O O O L L L L I I I I F F F F E E E E R R R R
OK OK OK OK OK OK KO KO KO KO KO KO M M M M A A A T T T T A A A A A H H H H A A A A I I I I C C C C C H H H H A A A A O O O O C C C C I I I I B B B B A A A A I I I I B B B B B U U U U L L L L A A A A N N N N G G G G S S S S A A A A I I I I B B B B O O O L L L L A A A A N N N N G G G A A A A I I I I
I I I I K K K K E E E E N N N N G G G G Y Y Y Y O O O U U U U M M M M O O O O T T T T H H H H E E E E R R R R F F F F U U U U C C C K K K K E E E E R R R R S S S S S S S S O O O O N N N S S S A A A A N N N N D D D D D D D D A A A A U U U U G G G G H H H H T T T T E E E R R R R S S S S O O O O O F F F F A A A A S S S S E E E E S S S S S
Monday, June 16, 2008
You , Me , Us
My heart still belongs to you.
Its has always been taken by you.
I liked you.
I tried to let go.
I managed to.
But, then i fell in love with you again.
Its like someone pushed the restart button.
This time it began even better then before.
I liked you.
There were no hangs or lags.
It was smooth.Too smooth to be true.
It shook me for a moment.
Did all the 'awkwardness' just disappear?
Or was it merely shoved aside once more?
Was it ignored just to reduce the barrier between us?
Which ever it was.I'm glad it happened.
I liked you.
Cause this time i fell for you.
Im not gonna let go. I was dumb and foolish to have did.
I really was 'stupid' to do that.
And i'll remain 'stupid' still.
I still liked you.
If being too nice is a sin.
I don't wanna be right.
If its what i have to do to make you smile.
I'll go to hell for it.
Cause I really liked you.
Even if it scars me, i'll give you that moment of happiness and laughter.
Even if it makes you guilty, i'll still make it a laughing matter.
Cause you're like that.
Potential to be happy is overwhelming in you.
I just like to dig it out.
Cause even when i am not in the mood the smile.
I laugh deep inside when i see you happy.
I liked you even more.
You torn me apart countless times.
You whine..like a kid :D
You complain..like a 70 year old grandma :P
You SNORE...like my dad ( LOL)
Yet we both know thats what broke down the walls separating us.
Which changed how i felt about you.
History rich in the highest zeniths and lowest nadirs that i could endure.
We met in a strange way in which i removed the chair from beside me so that you wont sit.
We got close in a strange way, tuition in december.( who does that)
I fell for you in the strangest way
Cause you're so adorable like that.
But i was never suitable for you.
Then, we separated for a moment there. 3 months due to NS.
I still did like you.
It took its toll on me.
And thanks to you i got myself addicted to Ruang Rindu and A1.
It still reminds me of you so much when i listen to it.
Then, the bars between us build up.
So much i can barely see you anymore, physically and mentally.
3 months later, even after you returned. Barriers were to big for us even as friends.
But i still liked you.
It just began with me wondering what were you studying in INTI.
Was it a spark that made me send that message?
It just came all of a sudden.
It was right then we started once again.
Then, so much happened even since.
I sinned for taking you to a club.
Guilty for being the cause of your lost handphone.
Which then caused myself to have to listen to the '3 hours' of cute-guy talk.
It did hurt. But i felt useful. Being there for you and all.
Cause I liked you.
Then, the next time. It didn't turn out well.
You got out of hand perhaps.
I felt useless.
I could not think clearly as to how am i even able to help you with that matter.
A break down. For another. Took a big chunk off my soul.
Yaya I liked you.
Not long later, i did tell you how much i liked you.
And that very moment, fear, anxiety, but you took it all away.
You just have that in you to make me laugh even though its the most awkward conversation we ever had.
How often do you hear someone laughing 10 seconds later after the guy confessed.
And the worse part is the girl is using it on you.
Cant help thinking bout that day. It defines happiness.
Although i was still not suitable for you.
But I started to like you more.
We both took our own 'stupid' path.
Yet, it tore apart so quick.
I created a big concrete wall between us.
Such awkwardness, which totally blocked out the both of us.
It was horrible, i would say the worst day we ever had.
Everything changed from then onwards.
We were never the same.
Things gone from bad to worse as time passes.
Until one day, we talked.
Started with arguing...ended with laughing.( i love this :D)
It made me like you more.
Everything started to turn out better from then onwards.
Though you told me not to wait.
I just did what i think is right or what i should do.
We were alright, better then that actually.
And then so much happened once again. This time the hectic life.
Dances and all. Tests for you.
But even in such a hectic situation we managed to continue with the apartment stay programme.
I made a mistake there, you were there for me to spill.
You just knew how to do it. Even though you have to guess to make me talk.
I fell in love with you over again.
Our awkwardness disapppeared.
We got close once again. Too close til i had to take claws for it :D
I had you. As a very close friend.
Now i have you more then a friend but less than a lover.
Its right in between. But im so glad and happy we got through so much together.
Lately, i've been spending quite some time with you. Even after the performance i still could see you cause you are my teacher after all :D
Then, for the weekend. You were away and i was busy. Sorry for not being able to accompany you much.
I said i will tell you when the stress is over. I will
Gimme that chance to tell and i definitely will.
Cause now i dont like you.
Cause everytime i look into your eyes. I know somethings there that i can have.
Something i tried to but couldn't succeed.
Something i desired and still desiring.
Something that keeps me smiling from day to day.
Something that i am still waiting for even though you said it was not worth it.
Cause i thought otherwise.
So yeah i am still waiting whether you realised it or not.
I love you.
Its has always been taken by you.
I liked you.
I tried to let go.
I managed to.
But, then i fell in love with you again.
Its like someone pushed the restart button.
This time it began even better then before.
I liked you.
There were no hangs or lags.
It was smooth.Too smooth to be true.
It shook me for a moment.
Did all the 'awkwardness' just disappear?
Or was it merely shoved aside once more?
Was it ignored just to reduce the barrier between us?
Which ever it was.I'm glad it happened.
I liked you.
Cause this time i fell for you.
Im not gonna let go. I was dumb and foolish to have did.
I really was 'stupid' to do that.
And i'll remain 'stupid' still.
I still liked you.
If being too nice is a sin.
I don't wanna be right.
If its what i have to do to make you smile.
I'll go to hell for it.
Cause I really liked you.
Even if it scars me, i'll give you that moment of happiness and laughter.
Even if it makes you guilty, i'll still make it a laughing matter.
Cause you're like that.
Potential to be happy is overwhelming in you.
I just like to dig it out.
Cause even when i am not in the mood the smile.
I laugh deep inside when i see you happy.
I liked you even more.
You torn me apart countless times.
You whine..like a kid :D
You complain..like a 70 year old grandma :P
You SNORE...like my dad ( LOL)
Yet we both know thats what broke down the walls separating us.
Which changed how i felt about you.
History rich in the highest zeniths and lowest nadirs that i could endure.
We met in a strange way in which i removed the chair from beside me so that you wont sit.
We got close in a strange way, tuition in december.( who does that)
I fell for you in the strangest way
Cause you're so adorable like that.
But i was never suitable for you.
Then, we separated for a moment there. 3 months due to NS.
I still did like you.
It took its toll on me.
And thanks to you i got myself addicted to Ruang Rindu and A1.
It still reminds me of you so much when i listen to it.
Then, the bars between us build up.
So much i can barely see you anymore, physically and mentally.
3 months later, even after you returned. Barriers were to big for us even as friends.
But i still liked you.
It just began with me wondering what were you studying in INTI.
Was it a spark that made me send that message?
It just came all of a sudden.
It was right then we started once again.
Then, so much happened even since.
I sinned for taking you to a club.
Guilty for being the cause of your lost handphone.
Which then caused myself to have to listen to the '3 hours' of cute-guy talk.
It did hurt. But i felt useful. Being there for you and all.
Cause I liked you.
Then, the next time. It didn't turn out well.
You got out of hand perhaps.
I felt useless.
I could not think clearly as to how am i even able to help you with that matter.
A break down. For another. Took a big chunk off my soul.
Yaya I liked you.
Not long later, i did tell you how much i liked you.
And that very moment, fear, anxiety, but you took it all away.
You just have that in you to make me laugh even though its the most awkward conversation we ever had.
How often do you hear someone laughing 10 seconds later after the guy confessed.
And the worse part is the girl is using it on you.
Cant help thinking bout that day. It defines happiness.
Although i was still not suitable for you.
But I started to like you more.
We both took our own 'stupid' path.
Yet, it tore apart so quick.
I created a big concrete wall between us.
Such awkwardness, which totally blocked out the both of us.
It was horrible, i would say the worst day we ever had.
Everything changed from then onwards.
We were never the same.
Things gone from bad to worse as time passes.
Until one day, we talked.
Started with arguing...ended with laughing.( i love this :D)
It made me like you more.
Everything started to turn out better from then onwards.
Though you told me not to wait.
I just did what i think is right or what i should do.
We were alright, better then that actually.
And then so much happened once again. This time the hectic life.
Dances and all. Tests for you.
But even in such a hectic situation we managed to continue with the apartment stay programme.
I made a mistake there, you were there for me to spill.
You just knew how to do it. Even though you have to guess to make me talk.
I fell in love with you over again.
Our awkwardness disapppeared.
We got close once again. Too close til i had to take claws for it :D
I had you. As a very close friend.
Now i have you more then a friend but less than a lover.
Its right in between. But im so glad and happy we got through so much together.
Lately, i've been spending quite some time with you. Even after the performance i still could see you cause you are my teacher after all :D
Then, for the weekend. You were away and i was busy. Sorry for not being able to accompany you much.
I said i will tell you when the stress is over. I will
Gimme that chance to tell and i definitely will.
Cause now i dont like you.
Cause everytime i look into your eyes. I know somethings there that i can have.
Something i tried to but couldn't succeed.
Something i desired and still desiring.
Something that keeps me smiling from day to day.
Something that i am still waiting for even though you said it was not worth it.
Cause i thought otherwise.
So yeah i am still waiting whether you realised it or not.
I love you.
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